In a stunning display of endurance, resilience, and raw plumbing prowess, Pierre Dubois, a seemingly average man from the picturesque village of Tarteauxpommes, France, has etched his name in the annals of human achievement. This past Sunday, Dubois shattered what many thought was an unbreakable barrier — the world record for the most toilet flushes … Read more
PoopsNews Special Report In a stunning and absolutely believable turn of events, the sleepy Russian village of Krylovskoye in the Perm region has once again hosted its world-famous (and entirely real) championship: the “Веселый коровяк” festival, otherwise known as the “Joyful Cowpat Toss”. Yes, you read that correctly—it’s the annual event where Russian women, with … Read more
In an explosive investigation by our PoopsNews, we’ve learned the shocking truth about the opening ceremony of the Paris 2024 Olympics. While millions of spectators huddled under umbrellas, damp from an unexpected downpour, little did they know that the rain could have been avoided altogether. Yes, you read that right. The stormy skies of Paris … Read more
A New Frontier in Personal Hygiene In these trying economic times, when inflation seems to hit even the most personal aspects of our lives, one can’t help but wonder: Is there a way to cut costs in places that no one has thought of before? Forget about skipping your daily latte or downgrading your streaming … Read more
The Outlandish Return of “Girls Don’t Poop” In an unprecedented convergence of scientific skepticism and cultural nostalgia, two of the most innovative fringe communities — flat-earthers and anti-vaxxers — have banded together in their newest mission: to convince the world that “Girls Don’t Poop”. Yes, you read that correctly — because what could be more … Read more
In what can only be described as a “total flush of common sense”, a viral TikTok prank in Mexico has unleashed an unexpected crisis, leaving clogged toilets, frustrated parents, and disillusioned children in its wake. At the center of this absurd drama is Mexico’s most notorious internet provocateur, Santiago “Santi” Chávez, a social media influencer … Read more
Orban’s One-Ply Scandal Shakes Europe to Its Core In a shocking revelation that’s bound to shake the very foundation of global politics, Hungarian Prime Minister Viktor Orban has been thrust into a scandal that could easily eclipse any economic, diplomatic, or environmental crisis to date. The world has faced wars, pandemics, and political upheavals, but … Read more
In a groundbreaking (and utterly mind-bending) announcement, a coalition of world-renowned mathematicians from the most prestigious universities have declared that the designation of public restrooms as “00” is not just mathematically inaccurate — it’s a violation of the very fabric of logic itself. This revelation was delivered with much fanfare at the International Mathematical Rectification … Read more
In a twist that has left global cultural watchdogs scratching their heads—and noses—India has proposed that the ancient tradition of defecating in open fields and rivers be officially recognized as part of UNESCO’s prestigious Intangible Cultural Heritage list. Yes, you read that right: the act of relieving oneself outdoors, in full view of cows, birds, … Read more
LONDON, UK — Britain is no stranger to long-running television sagas. From the many mysteries of Doctor Who to the endless cups of tea on Downton Abbey, the United Kingdom has been a global beacon of cinematic excellence. But now, this proud nation has graced the world with a new form of televised genius — … Read more